Our introductory post regarding Pathological Demand Avoidance can be found here. As a behavioral profile of autism, PDA is exceptionally challenging to navigate in a neurodiverse relationship. By its nature, marriage intrinsically necessitates collaboration – which requires reasonable agreeability on the part of both spouses. If a PDA partner chronically pursues autonomy at the expenseContinue reading “Part 2: The Antithetical Nature of “Partnership” with a PDA Spouse”
Category Archives: demand avoidance
Part 1: Autism, Pathological Demand Avoidance, and …Sociopathy?
Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) is a term used to reference a pattern of severe, chronic resistance toward cooperation with ordinary requests in daily life. PDA is considered by many to be an atypical presentation of autism, and has qualities that are seemingly inverse. Also referred to as Extreme Demand Avoidance, or Pervasive Drive for Autonomy,Continue reading “Part 1: Autism, Pathological Demand Avoidance, and …Sociopathy?”
Can Abuse be Attributed to an Autistic Spouse?
October was Domestic Violence Awareness month. (And as much as I wanted to post this blog in the appropriate month, I couldn’t quite make it happen.) During October, survivors, advocates and allies come together in hopes of raising awareness, mourning the tragedy of lives lost, and discussing the trauma and experience of intimate partner violence.Continue reading “Can Abuse be Attributed to an Autistic Spouse?”
Is it an autistic shut down, or an ASD shut out?
What are the differences between an autistic shutdown, autistic burnout and a common (but less defined, and rarely discussed) dynamic in neurodiverse marriage – the autistic shut out? What is an autistic shutdown? An autistic shutdown in is a short-term reaction to overwhelm. Perhaps the autistic individual has masked for an extended period of time,Continue reading “Is it an autistic shut down, or an ASD shut out?”
The Adversarial Dynamic of a neurodiverse marriage
When the neurodiverse marriage has spiraled into severe disenchantment, the ASD husband begins to view his neurotypical wife in an adversarial manner. The autistic partner is naturally self-focused, and his mind-blindness does not enable him to easily put context toward many of her expectations. He starts to regard his wife as an encumbrance to peaceContinue reading “The Adversarial Dynamic of a neurodiverse marriage”